Religious
Life She
likes the freedom but needs peers
By PATRICIA LEFEVERE
Special Report Writer
Renee Daigle is not about to
apologize for whats wonderful about her life. I get a full
nights sleep. I know when I go to bed I wont be awakened by a
crying child. Her six nieces and nephews have all stayed overnight in the
convent with their aunt, the nun and the four other sisters in her
community.
Daigle, 37, entered the Marianites of Holy Cross, in New Orleans,
almost 16 years ago. Until a few months ago she was the youngest sister
although shed seen many younger than her enter and leave. Now in her
fourth year as vocations director for her province, she goes wherever she can
to be with young people and to encourage young women to consider religious
life.
Her days are full of visiting confirmation classes and high
schools. She gives busy persons retreats and hangs out with
Theology on Tap, a group of Catholics aged 21 to 40 who meet monthly in a local
bar for happy hour, followed by a speaker. The New Orleans archdiocese sponsors
the program.
She is also pursuing a masters degree in curriculum and
early childhood studies at the University of New Orleans after teaching
pre-school and kindergarten for 10 years. Her dream is to run a day care
center.
Did she ever want to have children? Of course, she
told NCR. One of the joys of being a Marianite is the chance to discuss
such feelings and the struggles that others in her community have had over such
choices. Nobody can have it all in married or single life. These are
choices I chose to live with. No one forced me to choose them.
What she has gained from her community is encouragement to take
leadership roles in the order and in other organizations. Theyve
called on my own gifts. Im free to be an individual. Theres no set
box I have to fit in, she said.
The Marianites have also challenged me to stretch.
Theyre not letting me be complacent, she said. If I were
married, I would expect my husband to challenge me to be my best self.
Daigle already had her degree in elementary education from
Nicholls State University in Thibodaux, La., when she entered. That day might
not have dawned but for an awakening retreat offered at the
diocesan run Nicholls Catholic Center, where the Marianite vocations director
used to hang out with the students. The center helped nurture three
or four vocations among Daigles classmates.
The Marianites had been Daigles primary and secondary school
teachers. Her great aunt, Marianite Sr. Edmund Schexnaildre, 90, stopped
teaching four years ago. While the order was more familiar to her than any
other, Daigle was still shocked when a member of the order asked her:
Renee, are you going to be a nun?
I was screaming and hollering in the car. I almost made her
let me out. I knew these women were not perfect, Daigle said, Some
were even a little eccentric. But her invitation fostered my curiosity to learn
more.
When she finally admitted to herself, Im going to try
it, Daigle found peace. I knew I had nine years to make up my
mind. After living the life for three years, she took her first vows. She
said final vows seven years ago.
The hardest thing about the life is not having other sisters her
age. I need peer relations. Thats why she enjoys spending
time with graduate students, other young singles and married folks.
At times Daigle bristled that her own growing stages were
discounted. On her 30th birthday, she expected congratulations, but instead was
told by some sisters: Oh, 30 is nothing. Were twice your age.
That made Daigle angry.
So did an older sisters stare last summer when Daigle wore
shorts to a retreat on a hot Louisiana day. But like many Gen Xers, Daigle has
no hesitation speaking about her feelings -- unlike many older members of
religious orders. I dont take it. I give it right back, she
said. When she communicated her feelings to the sister whod looked
disapprovingly at her, the elder nun was apologetic. Today they are close
friends. Daigle noted that older sisters may pass judgment unintentionally.
Daigle thinks that members of religious communities must be
willing to do whatever we expect of those in formation. This includes
setting goals, evaluating the goals and one another, listening, sharing our
lives and opening our homes to young people. Our sisters identify so much
with their ministries that we often forget were part of a community,
too -- not just the principal or the food pantry worker, she said.
National Catholic Reporter, February 23,
2001
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