Column Make room for wild and domesticated priesthood
By KRIS BERGGREN
It seems impossible to be a Catholic
in the United States today and not to be thinking about the clergy sex abuse
scandal. Like my 65 million companions in the faith, Ive been shocked to
hear details of the betrayal of children and young adults, and felt the
stomach-turning indignity of allegations brushed under the plush rug of
bishops offices. The crimes against the victims of abuse and their
families are abominable. So is the breach of faith the institution is
committing against its own.
One man in my parish prayed this weekend in particular for the
people in the Boston archdiocese where his mother lives. He said she and her
friends, lifelong Catholics, are devastated by the ongoing unfolding of shame,
secrecy and hypocrisy. For the past month, he said, he hasnt had a
conversation with his mother without her breaking into tears about the
situation.
I believe that abusive priests and their prelate protectors should
resign. A priest who has so grievously betrayed a tender member of his flock is
free to seek redemption and work out his salvation apart from his role as an
ordained minister of the church. Perhaps his lifelong penance would be to
relinquish the gifts of his ordination. I cant help but speculate that
deciding whether to defrock criminal priests would be far more clear-cut for
the cardinals and pope if the church were not simultaneously facing a crisis of
numbers in the priesthood.
The circumstances beg for a discussion of healthy sexuality as it
relates to spirituality and vocation, as well as for a discussion of a new
vision of ordained priesthood. It also begs for a discussion about the meaning
of the sacraments and of the radical gospel mission of the church. Opening the
doors wide to married priests would likely fill seminaries and ultimately get
the sacraments delivered abundantly all around. But heres where it gets
really tricky for me.
Sacramental life is so critical to the church, but as Fr. Richard
Rohr in his recent Lenten series in this newspaper has observed, the way we
do the sacraments has become by and large an empty ritual for so
many. It is not our ordained priesthood thats in jeopardy; its our
common priesthood. Its we who have to back off the idea of Father
knows best and take responsibility for our own faith, as individuals and
as communities.
In principle, I support the idea of ordaining married people and
women to the priesthood. But I worry about the demands of family life and the
potential conflicts of interest for a priest who must choose between competing
moral interests. A priest with children might like to do civil disobedience to
protest the School of the Americas, or intervene in some street conflict in
an-inner city neighborhood at risk to personal safety. What if that priest is
the only one who could offer sacraments at a parish? Or is the sole breadwinner
for a family? I think of all the martyrs, the missionaries, the labor
organizers, the ministers to the marginalized -- all those who boldly and
effusively give away their love at great personal cost. Who, despite their
fears for their own safety or comfort, continue to bring the gospel truth with
their committed presence to areas of great need. Where, in a discussion of the
benefits of ordaining married men (or single or married women) is the
discussion of making room for this kind of servant leader?
Easy for me to say. Im comfortable in my family life and at
my desk, warning others of the perils of turning our traditions upside down. I
will make a case, then, for the complementary nature of the vocations of priest
and parent. The vocation of parenthood requires hard work and struggle mingled,
ideally, with great joy and satisfaction. Some have it harder than others;
their children may require more care or present greater challenges for any
number of reasons. Still, I know Im a better parent when Im not on
deadline, and Im a better writer when I havent been up three times
in the middle of the night with a sick kid.
Likewise, a priest takes on a life of hard work and struggle,
mingled ideally with great joy and satisfaction. Some get to play Wednesday
golf with parishioners who open their purses to the parish. Other priests make
nursing home rounds to pray with aging seniors or practice their best listening
skills at parish council budget meetings. Others choose a life of material
hardship to minister to the marginalized in countries far from home or to folks
in a domestic demographic as foreign as if it were a hemisphere away. Some
images of priesthood seem to mesh more realistically with the demands of family
life, while other images present, in my mind, real ethical challenges to a
priestly life.
Is there not room for both kinds of priesthood, the domesticated
and the wild, if you will?
For some people, their Christian vocation is played out through a
relationship with one particular beloved person -- and from there to the
ability to extend their circle of love to others, whether children, neighbors
or complete strangers. For others, their desire is to love universally, to
limit or forego a bound relationship with one other in order to be able to give
boundless love in the name of Jesus Christ. If we value all holy choices
equally, then we embrace each others choice more fully in the faithful
living of our own. And ideally, those called to be priests would live their
vows in this light.
Kris Berggren writes from Minneapolis. Her e-mail address
is krisberggren@msn.com
National Catholic Reporter, May 24,
2002
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